Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
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