i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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