sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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