weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
