And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
i drank out of a bidet.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
