She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
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