i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
Randomize
