if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
Randomize
