Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
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