I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
Randomize
