I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
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