We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
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