i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Randomize