Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
you have to choose: penises or morals?
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
Randomize
