At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
my grandpa was trying to put butter into the pepsi and i'm like "grandpa what are you doing" and he looks down and goes "well i guess that wouldn't taste good anyway"
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
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