Pappa wants mamma naked
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Randomize