dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
love makes seman taste better
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
Randomize
