Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
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