Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
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