You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize
