Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Randomize
