You're completely useless in the revolution.
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
I came so hard my ears popped.
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
Randomize
