turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
I just took what could be the most awkward shit in my life, which considering my definition of awkward and my experiences shitting, is pretty fucking awkward.
...
I was sitting there doing my business and the guy in the stall next to me banged on the stall and asked me how to spell picnic because he wasn't sure.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
