Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
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