I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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