I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Randomize