oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Randomize