Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
Thanks for being the best husband and reassuring my fuck buddy that you're comfortable with my adultery. You da real MVP.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
Randomize