Kareoke will never be a sober sport
I think I just saw someone hide a body.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Randomize
