Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
Randomize
