I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize