so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize
