If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
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