So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
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