Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
