Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
Randomize
