You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Randomize
