woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Randomize
