don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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