i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Randomize
