I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
Randomize
