what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Randomize