Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Randomize
