I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
Randomize
