No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Randomize
