K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
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