dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
It's rum buckets o'clock
I think people are normalizing furries
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
Randomize
