i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
