I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
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