I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
Where are you?
In a non slutty way
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Randomize