Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
Randomize
